I don't think of 'narcissism' as excessive love for oneself. I see it as a kind of enslavement or ensnarement.


Narcissus didn't love himself all that excessively, not at the start. But he was cursed by the gods to be enraptured by his own reflection.


The pull of his bewitchment with himself was so strong that it killed him. Given free will in the matter, I'm sure he wouldn't have chosen to do this: but, under his curse, he bent to the pool to kiss his reflection and drowned.


Did he enjoy being enslaved to his own reflection? This is like asking, do people enjoy sights of horrible carnage? Perhaps they do. But they also say they feel sickened by them—but can't look away.


There are times you fall into such traps. You're enslaved by thoughts of yourself—you can't tear free of them. They're generally thoughts of self-hatred or self-belittlement.


You're 'bad'—a 'bad' person. This becomes all you can think about. It draws you down deeper into self-loathing, toward self-destruction. Deeper and deeper. This is narcissism.


All the other, objectively more important issues in life fade away, and you can only see how awful you are, reflected back up at you from a black, deep pool—and this is the reflection that you have no choice but to kiss.


But how has this come to pass? Did the gods curse you?


Did you curse yourself?

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